life

The Night I Quit

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We’ve all been there; you know the days that drag on with kids acting disobediently and your own emotions running particularly high as a result. With every mean thing uttered and every failed listening ear; you begin to wonder where have you gone wrong? I just want to quit! 


Last week as my husband traveled for work I was blessed with one of those days. Was I speaking a language they did not recognize? 

“No more electronics”

“Stop running… Someone will get hurt”

“Time to get ready for bed”

“Ummmm…hello, it’s bed time”

I sat, in total disbelief. My heart heavy and tears burning the back of my eyes. Clearly I just want to throw in the towel and quit; but, moms can’t quit. It’s the job that you can’t quit at; or can you? I say the words. “I quit!” I repeat it as the noise volume is at decibels most should never experience. “I quit!” 

I am hurt, angry, and very frustrated. I tell the kids they were suppose to be in bed 15 minutes prior and that their in charge; clearly they think I’m joking. I begin to do my nightly chores; fold laundry, put clothes away, evening straightening from a day of chaos, lesson plans, and dirty dishes. They watch attentively as mom moved busily about. I remind them that there is school in the morning and act responsibly. Children need sleep. 

9:00 rolls around; they are still up. Calmly I ask if they remember where their beds are as I’m not “doing” bedtime tonight. Three sad faces blank staring back at me; I feel it, I can’t quit. They need me despite their immature behavior. I am responsible to train them and guide their ignorance and immaturity. I want to bang my head on the counter. Grumpily, I put one by one in their beds. Apologies are said before night slumbers and thanksgivings given for yes, even the days we want to quit. 

We are called to a job of no turning back: a constant selflessness and pouring of self. It is a job with no monies paid but hugs a plenty: there is no quitting, no end, and no perfect method. We are all perfectly imperfect sinners just trying to figure this thing called life out. (Tweet This)

1000 Gifts of Mothering

1. Boo Boo kisses
2. Midnight kisses
3. Snuggles while reading good books
4. Butterfly Kisses
5. I Love You’s a plenty
6. Imperfect days with sincere apologies
7. Chances to make all wrongs right
8. Childrens laughter
9. Busy chatter among siblings
10. My big family

The Merry-Go-Round of Life

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Round and round we go; its funny how life on earth is sort of like a merry-go-round. We ride the ride; up and down, round and round we go. We hold on tight and don’t let go. Well, that is until the ride comes to a complete stop.
Did you enjoy your ride; or are you left with regret? 
Lately, I am finding myself in a constant push and pull oppose to the constant up and down motion we readily expect in life. These past few weeks I have had several ‘behind the scenes’ projects/dreams coming to surface. I have been up crazy late and up way to early just to get it all done. The push until I can’t any more and the pull; is this what I’m suppose to be doing? 
I was giving up writing; I was closing my blogs, I was hanging up my ‘mom blogger’ hat. How did I possibly go from wanting to delete every social media everything to this? 
What am I doing? What am I being called to do? Is it write? Is it minister to others? Is it mentor? 
Truth be told, I do not know fully what is in store , but what I do know is there are big things happening. When we say ‘yes’ and don’t throw in the towel; like we so often have a tendency to do. We shut the doors before they fully open. We jump off when things get hard. We find ourselves regretting, confused, and frustrated as a result.
Well, this time friends this girls going to keep ‘pushing’ forward because i know in the end it will lead to an ‘upward’ motion of achievement. The ‘push’ is hard and the ‘pull’ is sometimes the hardest. It is a juggle and a struggle and one I could do without. In the end the merry-go-round keeps spinning all the while. It doesn’t stop so you can jump off whenever you please. There is a set time for you to exit and until the final ‘bell’ sounds. You will ‘push’ because you believe ‘you’ are capable of more! Sit, dream, and DO!

Five minute Friday; rhythm

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So better late than never…it is Friday you know where you hop over to the awesome Lisa-Jo Bakers sight and look for today’s prompt. There are only 2 rules; you can only write for 5 minutes and you must show some blog love and comment on the persons post that linked before you. That’s it! There is no editing, perfecting, or spell check going on it is just the real deal stemmed from one little word. Join in the #FMFPARTY

Today’s word; Rhythm

GO….

The song and dance of life creates a rhythm so sweet sometimes it’s as if we are undeserving.  The gifts we are blessed with. The love that we are given. The undeserving grace, constant forgiveness, and the endless opportunities to better ourselves. Behind every closed door God is there waiting for you to open another. While the rhythm of life flows like a river it is not always thought of as glorious. There are those times the rhythm of life is so crazy, fast it’s as if a storm is waiting to push us down. Those rhythms which leave us unstable are not HIM! They are lies it is hard; we are pushed  beyond our limits. We want to quit: we want to give up, stop moving, and stand still. We are called to a halt; a halt of movement. We are left to reevaluate. Where are we going? How are we getting there? We must lean on faith and faith alone to get moving again. What is our purpose.

The rhythm of  life is not something we are in constant awareness but we are called to keep the rhythm going. Keep the song and dance of life alive and keep it running smoothly. Spreading messages of love, laughter, hope, and courage. Despite the halting road blocks that are thrown our way. We will find the joy in the small things to keep moving forward.
I pray my sweet friends that you are not stopped by any storms. There are no storms to big or to small that deserve your song and dance to stop. Your rhythm of life may need altering here and there. You may need to prioritize, restructure, and rely on hope. However, don’t let the storms stop you! You are not alone! 
Hold strong the ‘crazy’ dances are temporary and as are the songs of ‘peace’. It is a constant eb and flow of life.
The ups and downs the rhythm keeps us moving to where we are going. Keep your life in check… and dance to the music of life!
STOP!